Tuesday, January 3, 2012

The Voices In My Head

Already I am struggling with this blog.

Who knew it would be so difficult to find my own voice? Last night I had many thoughts rolling around in my head to go with my picture. Three different blog posts, all deleted. I was trying too hard. Not one was my voice. The man I love gently reminded.

"Who are you writing this for?"

Right. I am writing this for myself. I am not writing this to impress other people. If I'm being honest, though, there's a part of me that would be gratified if someone - anyone - was inspired by something I said... but that is not the purpose of this. My intention is to grow personally.

I started to pray, "Lord, what do YOU want me to say? What is it that you want me to learn today?" And then these thoughts came. Write about this. Write about your challenges. The purpose of this blog, after all, is to share my lessons, my journey, and I have always expressed myself best through writing.

So what am I learning today? How to find my own voice. It's shocking, really, to hear all the different voices in my head. (Yes, there are many. Yes, I heard that. No, I'm not insane.) Those voices are all there for a purpose. Good, bad or indifferent, they help shape who I am. But my purpose is to be me, and I don't sound exactly like them.

I know who I am, my identity is not in question. But what do I sound like? My intention is to be open, real, honest. Maybe even raw. I am thankful for my struggles because they mean I am learning, growing, becoming.

This is my journey. This is my voice.

1 comment:

  1. Looking forward to reading your blog.